Wednesday, December 5, 2012

Bitter sweet

This day was spent like 20% blogging, 20% surfing/stalking/goofing, 30% praying, 10% eating, and 20% sleeping. I am in the part now wherein i'm gonna write what I feel inside, sleep it away and hopefully when I wake up, start movin' on just like you.

A friend texted me early this morning informing me that the quiz was given as a take home exam by our prof. She's so kind to have placed my email add in the paper where they were writing (again, thanks to you) and so I didn't have to prep up for school. Thanks to her I didn't have to go to the campus and see faces I hate to see for the time being.

The quiz turned take home exam defeats now the promise I made to myself. The London thing and the deactivate everything thing. Fate knows how to play well, eh?

To cut the crap, i'm writing this one LAST blog post to give myself the closure I need. I've been praying for enlightenment the day everything started to fall apart and I guess He answered me just when I visited the church this afternoon.

I stayed there for a couple of hours, attended 2 masses and a half and voila, SANITY's back. :') I'm not saying that in just a snap, my world turned into something quite different but I guess what I felt there was a stronger me, a light-hearted me, a better me.

Heartbreaks tend to make people bitter. I really was, yet I told myself I would never stay bitter for long. Fighting against what your heart desires, is like the HARDEST thing ever. It's like trying to fight a new born - YOU JUST CAN'T. It's like reaching for the skies - QUITE IMPOSSIBLE. But no matter how hard, how impossible or how devastating it may become, you just have to hold on to that one fact that could help you go on with your life - THE PERSON YOU LOVE IS HAPPY NOW, SO YOU SHOULD ALSO BE.

Loving is painful. But it's better than feeling nothing at all. Love has taught me a lot of things. And it still continues to teach me lessons for life. I've lost friends because of love. I've lost myself because of love. However, it is to be noted that because of love also, I found myself again. That love I am referring to now is love for oneself.

I have to love myself in order for me to pick up the pieces and make 'em whole again. I have to love myself so that one day I can open my heart again for someone I am going to spend eternity with.

All my love experiences are unique and great in there own ways. But this one's something I'd never forget until my deathbed. This one's gonna be treasured 'til I finally find someone who'll mend my broken heart. :')

Our love failed, but the feeling goes on. I don't know for how long but I am quite certain that it'll take me too much time. It's not an easy process but I know I can. You made it so I think I'll make it too.

I think every word that has been said are really meant. So, i'm taking an exit. From now on, i'm not gonna send questions like 'musta' or whatsoever to you anymore. I'm not gonna say anything. I'm not gonna haunt you with the memory I might bring. I'm not gonna bother your life and the people in it. And as you wish, I WILL STAY AWAY FROM YOU. Feel free to forget that once in your life, you met a stupid Jonas. Forget that I even exist.

Before I finally end this post, I want you to know that everything I felt was real; just like you. And please, don't be too unfair in saying that it was my intention of hurting you because I have never thought of that ever since. Your happiness is so important to me that I'm letting you go now.

So there.

A lot of thanks to the girl who meant the world to me for almost 2 years now. A lot of apologies to that same girl who I have disappointed for so many times. And a lot of hugs from me to you for eternity. Take care of yourself, you know me so well that I don't have to tell you what taking care is, the pogi-pretty way. A part of me will always be in love with you, too. Thank you, thank you, thank you! This is really goodbye. It HURTS but all I know is that loving YOU is BITTER SWEET. *insert a river of Jonas' tears here*

Wo ai ni! <3 *insert You and I collide here*

P.S. Let's be happy. Let's smile. Let's make the best of who we are, pogi! :')

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

What if

What if I turn into someone really bad? Like the exact opposite of who and what I am now? Just a thought. This day's driving me insane. Let's go to the church. :')

Gotta leave with this thought:

If you stand for a reason, be prepared to stand alone like a tree, and if you fall on the ground, fall like a seed that grows back to fight again.

P.S. I miss you :'(

You and I collide

I need an html music code for You and I collide, please help me find one. I really need it. Badly need it. Thank you! :')

The dawn is breaking
A light shining through
You're barely waking
And I'm tangled up in you

I'm open, you're closed
Where I follow, you'll go
I worry I won't see your face
Light up again

Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme
Out of the doubt that fills my mind
I somehow find
You and I collide

I'm quiet you know
You make a first impression
I've found I'm scared to know I'm always on your mind

Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the stars refuse to shine
Out of the back you fall in time
I somehow find
You and I collide

Don't stop here
I lost my place
I'm close behind

Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme
Out of the doubt that fills your mind
You finally find
You and I collide

You finally find
You and I collide
You finally find
You and I collide

This has been playing for 20 times now. Wooh. Saksak sa baga ang paglimot.


Wordpress is quite demanding. But i'm starting to like it. :') Will be facing the computer for the next 12 hours? That'll suffice. I think. :'D


Will be leaving blogspot soon. :') Bye! Find me @ -------> wordpress ^___^

Monday, December 3, 2012


I should get an A this Wednesday or else, I will delete all my accounts in different social networking sites and I won't go to London with my Family. That, I promise. I'm too f^cked up.


I've read everything. From your tweets, tumblr posts and mail. I'm trying to comprehend everything and i'd like to ask for an apology ahead because i'm afraid i'm not gonna be able to reply to it anytime soon. For a number of reasons that is. I just want you to know that I understand you more than you think I can. And whatever they say does not really matter. There's nothing to be sorry about but there's a lot of things to be thankful for. You're one of it. Today, I want you to promise me you'll be happy. Promise me. :') Stay safe, Beautiful! :')

P.S. Adieu, Au Revoir